As we approach a new school year, many pupils will be excited about seeing friends again, making new connections, and finding their place in the classroom community. But for some children, the return to school brings a very different challenge: friendships don’t come easily.
We see it every year — pupils who struggle to join in games, who clash with peers, or who drift alone in the playground. These difficulties often have little to do with effort or desire, and everything to do with hidden struggles in the brain.
The truth is, friendship skills don’t come naturally to every child. More often than not, these difficulties reflect underlying challenges with executive function, emotional regulation, and social understanding.
The Brain Behind Friendships
Successful social relationships demand much more than simply wanting friends. Pupils rely on:
- Executive function skills to plan, take turns, and adapt when things change
- Emotional regulation to manage frustration, disappointment, or rejection
- Perspective-taking to recognise how their words and actions affect others
When these underlying skills are underdeveloped, the result can look like “rudeness,” “immaturity,” or “attention-seeking behaviour.” In reality, these are signs that a pupil’s brain is working hard — and sometimes struggling — to keep up with the demands of social life.
Why This Matters in the Classroom
Friendship difficulties don’t stay in the playground. They affect self-esteem, wellbeing, and engagement with learning. Pupils who feel excluded or misunderstood are more likely to withdraw, act out, or disengage from classroom activities. Over time, this can have a lasting impact on both academic and personal outcomes.
As educators, understanding the brain science behind friendships gives us a powerful lens. Instead of asking, “Why can’t this child get along with others?”, we can ask, “What skills does this child need support with?”
Practical Strategies Teachers Can Use
The good news is that these skills can be taught and nurtured. In our upcoming CPD webinar, Why Are Friendships So Hard?, we’ll explore:
- How to recognise the executive function skills underpinning social success
- Classroom strategies to help pupils manage emotions and build empathy
- Practical ways to scaffold positive peer interactions
- Approaches to create inclusive environments where all pupils can connect.
If you’ve ever wished you had more tools to support pupils who find friendships challenging, this session is for you. You’ll leave with a clearer understanding of the neuroscience behind social skills and a set of classroom-ready strategies to make a real difference.
📅 16 September 4:30 – 5:30 pm (BST)
🎟️ Click here to book your spot
Every child deserves the chance to experience friendship, belonging, and support. As we approach a new school year, this is the perfect time to equip yourself with the tools to help them thrive.